Hoodrat Thug Love

Hey mami! This post is for all the hoodrats out there. You are crushable too with your thong straps showing and your rowdy style tattoos. Your so hood that the only acccesory you need for your outfit is a bat. Oye, we can go to the fleamarket on Sundays, we can share a pickle*, some hot cheetos, and wash it down with Big Red*. We can walk in the mall with my hand on your neck in the ruca hold. We can grow old together and I wont mind your ears stretching down real low from years of wearing pinche big earrings. Hoodrats are down and got your back por vida. Thats love.

* Pickles must be accompanied by a chinese candy.

* - Big Red is a throwed red soda that is puro San Antonio...best from glass bottles.

Flip this.

The woman you see here is Kristen Kemp, host of TLC's TV show "Property Ladder", a show that makes any fool like myself believe money can be made soooo easily from flipping houses. Doesn't she kind of look like she could be Scarlett Johansson's hot mom? She looks like she wakes up in the morning looking exactly the way she does in that photo except she probably has a cup of coffee in her hand. And every single hair on her head knows the exact role it plays and stays that way all throughout the day. She, like my other crush Kat Von D, is also from Mexico and came to the U.S. at a young age and became an actress. Kirsten is a badass... she knows her real-estate and I want to flip houses with my crush.